A spirit writing by Tara ….
This spirit writing came through while traveling up the coast of northern Maine. When I solo travel I don’t tend to have a destination nor know what I will find along the way. I stopped to sleep at Wolfe’s Neck Campground and was sitting in my tent overlooking Casco bay when the back of my head began to buzz; a sure-sign that spirit is ready to write.
Life is not about living in one way or another way. Life is about living life in the only way that feels good and true for you to live. To do so, you must breathe your way through each moment and listen acutely with each of your God given senses.
This is a 10-minute streamline writing, more about them here.
“Best mom ever” he says leaning heavily into me so I reach out to brace myself on the kitchen counter. The world stops in this moment for I have been without my son’s love extending this way. I know what it feels like to have him to choose to ignore me, to express hate for me, to wish me away.
I have felt that level of disconnect and want nothing more than to connect with him now. Feed him all the cookies in the world as I rest just so, making my whole self available when he chooses to plug in and connect.
This is a guest post spirit writing. Being abandoned is a tough pill to swallow and writing about this touchy subject brings perspective and understanding. What you see here has not been edited or changed, you read it as the writer received it.
It is hard to describe to someone who has always had a mother, what NOT having one is like. I guess those who are motherless too have the most understanding on this topic, yet for each and every one of us it is different. We have different triggers, different longings and while one may think that the need for a mother may dissipate over time, it is in fact quite the opposite.
This spirit writing came at a time when my 14 year old began to pull away and live with his dad. For weeks I felt anger, guilt, sadness, and decided to sit down, bring in my higher guides and write.
He is broody, this is true. But in this very way so are you. He is inner, you are outer and this is all a balancing act. You both are playing in the age-old game. The trick is not to look down or all around and definitely don’t look back. That’s the easiest way to fall. For there will be regrets galore for why did you do that? Why didn’t I do this? See, there you go already thinking of it all.